WHAT KIND OF DAY??

what kind of a day was it for me??...tiring ,i might say...got abt 4 hours of sleep last night..woke at 5:30 am...had an exam from 7..till 12. that was tiring...then came back...said goodbye to a friend in the afternoon... then went off to drop some notes...then at around 5,bid farewell to yet another friend..damn!! went to pinus place after that ...to watch the tapes of the play..it was awesome... saw myself acting for the first time..wasnt bad...then have come back home...gotta get down to studies...awwwww shit!!!!


so, what kind of day was it??? tiring...sleepy...gloomy(there were clouds,you see)...sad..joyous....hmmm ..let me see... it was a COMPLETE DAY....ya,that sounds quite nice..A COMPLETE DAY!!!

ITS A LONG GOODBYE!!

shits happening with me. sad shit. a lot of it. my friends are leaving . most of them.actually almost all of my old friends are leaving. and i am sad. bob is leaving tomoro .USA . for 2 years. soumitri is leaving tomoro for delhi. sayanto is leaving for chennai.shayeri is leavin for bangalore.kenneth,dear pinu, is leavin next month.and he broke this news to me today.it was the last nail in my coffin.oh,and uma is leaving too,for hyderabad. and a few friends are already out of the city or the country. DAMN!!
do u blame me for being so down in the dumps?? i want to seal my mouth shut;i dont want the goodbyes pouring out of it. i want to chop my arms off;so i wont be able to hug my friends when the time comes to part ways!! i want to gouge my eyes out;so i wont be able to see them leave. i want to break my legs;so i wont be able to walk away from them. will this stop them from going? i dont think so. i dont want to stop them;BUT i wanna stop them. i dont kno . i am a mess
thank god for the new friends i have made.u kno who u r. tough days ahead fr u guys.
i dont kno wat to do. i dont even kno wat it is the point of this blog. does this ease the pain and suffering?? man,i am a wreck. and nothing in the universe can cheer me up. i kno it for a fact. friends are leaving.... i wil too;one day surely... and then wat??? wen shall we meet?? shall we ever?? too fatalistic?? i dont think so. i am feeling so empty rite now. my head is buzzing,my eyes are burning,my stomach is churning.... i am feeling so alone rite now!!! rite now,i am very lonely!! music is not helping....for the first time in my life,its not working. rite now,music is so detrimental...aaaaarrrghh!!!!!

dont kno wat to do...dont kno wat to say...except.......GOODBYE......

BACKSTAGE BACKSTAGE!!

ya ya i am still stuck up the play. got a lot to say.bob pointed out a very glaring flaw in my posts.i hardly mentioned the bacstage crew.it is a serious error.dont know how i could have not mentioned yhem.especially soumitrti ,bob and mirna. bloody hell,they slogged and slogged day and night for the play.stitching,pasting,stapling,folding,cutting.... they stayed up nights at athenas place while we actors were happily snoozing away.mindblowing...hats and everything off to you guys. subhayans costume..a masterpiece..so too diyasrees and kenneths and the 3 witches and everyone. and special thanks to arundhuti for my sparkling belt...that belt is what made tomjohn work.believe me!! these guys were there throughout ,and so was ranja. i will never forget ranja..she is the first to apply makeup on me.oh my god it was a traumatizing experience...the gooey foundation which went dry afterwards,the eyeliner,application of which almost resulted in blindness for me.and how could i forget the various shades of lipstick..brown,then red,and......pink too!!!my gaaawdd!!but it was all good.it was all worth it.thank you ,you guys,we couldnt have done it without you.no way!!!

IT HAS BEEN AN HONOUR!!

so ,the hurly burly is done,the battles lost and won...we did it!!! the play ..we pulled it off..it was a success..we forgot lines..forgot cues...movements..but we got the laughs!!! we did it! all the hard work paid off in a big way. all those 4 pm to 9 pm sessions,where we spent half the time monkeying around..with the director ranting away and making all of us sit in a circle and lecturing us...we are actors..we are the opposites of people..we are travellers!!!(oh!!the intellectual masturbation). The agony and the ecstacy...of learning ur lines and movements...and forgetting them..and rehearsals going perfectly on some days and disastrously on others. getting the emotions just right..and then forgetting them the next minute. getting stuck with saying a line in a way it is not supposed to be said and not getting it right after innumerable tries..and then suddenly getting it!!these small moments of ecstacy. and then yesterday happened.it started RAINING!!!we had to take the props and everything to the theatre in the rain!! then the starting time of the show was pushed back by half an hour! and then rang out the third bell...curtains up!!i was hyperventilating...my hands were shaking..but it went well!! and so did the whole play..it was a rush..acting and then rushing down for change of costumes and makeup and rushing back up and taking a few hurried puffs of cigarettes in between..but it all went off perfectly...and then after a couple of hours..scene 23!!the last scene.when jogu said her line...when shall we three meet again?...i felt all the air rushing out of my lungs..now it was well and truly over..wat with me skipping a line ,jijo covering up,jijo cutting in too quickly,mo saying "road" instead of "river",subhayan taking an eternity to deliver a particular dialogue..all of us frozen on stage...kenneth and srin happily forgetting their lines and staring at each other for assistance...athena mumbling a line...shatra running off before i could finish my lines..me carrying on all the same...ohhhhh!!!! but we pulled it off!! hats off to the backstage especially bob and soumitri and mirna..they worked their asses off..stayed up nights and all. and then we paaaaarrtiieedd!!we drank and smoked and we danced!! tiny dancer!!! lay me down in sheets of linen...u had a busy day today!! srin and i beted out an impromptu duet!!! and dancing with athena!u can dance,girl!!whoa!! and finally crashing out for the night!! on the floor!! we had fun?u bet we did. however this IS the END!!jogu is leaving tomorrow!!diyasree and soumitri are leaving quite soon. all the other guys i will meet!!hope so!! ya we will. it was great fun while it lasted. all i can say now to all u wonderful people.....IT WAS AN HONOUR!!!!!

SCREAMS!ALARUMS!!

So,this is my first blog!! no clue wat to do. i will just go ahead and type randomly.
today is a very important day for me.its the day of my stage debut.oh, i am actin in a play my friend is directing.never thought of myself as an actor.but guess i am one now. it all started abut 2 months ago.the auditions and the rehearsals.it was a subhayans place, a brilliant actor and a brilliant friend.i remember subhayan ,in his own house,comin for auditions,all spick and span,hair gelled and styled,the true star from day one. i was a nervous wreck then too.then the floodgates opened,and people i didnt know were pourin in,everyone knew each other except i.Kenneth,(who i kno),athena ,srin,jogu ,diyasree. all of them brilliant actors.However,as days passed,i felt i had known them for a long time. Azeem,i have forgotten to mention azeem,the azman. and pablo,and jijo.all of us were just thrown together and were expected too pull off a play.dont know wat debanjan was thinking.maybe he wasnt.
anyway,time has just flown passed,flossy has been there with us,always hovering in the background,and here we are.D-DAY is upon us.maybe we will rock it.maybe we will mess up.watever,all of us r in this together.we have had our ups and downs.we had one yesterday.i remember a certain girl sitting in the middle of the stage,taking off her boots,and telling me,"all of you,fuck off!!". OUCH!! That hurt!!but we have sorted it out.another memorable(!!) experience- athena and srin wailin out halleluah,with lot of feeling.and thats about it.After the play, most of us are going in very different directions.diyasree,jogu,soumitri are goin away to delhi.subhayan,my duke,is goin away too.kenneth will be busy with his studies,and soon,with his job.debanjan will leave town too.athena,srin ,azeem,jijo ,pablo will all be here,busy with their own lives.maybe i will be busy too.hope so.we definitely wont be hanging around like we r now. i will miss them all.i will miss the stupid ,mindless fun we have.SHOTGUN cigarettes!! SGOTGUN 29!! SHOTGUN azeem!!(i dont kno why!!!). the wrestling contests,the armwrestling contests,singing tiny dancer (very badly) and wooing jogu,srin,and athena!! Sorry if i ever crossed the line.hope i didnt.if i did,i didnt mean to.u guys are just too good.
i can go on today.i am all "sappy" about all of you. Will miss u all .a lot.hope we keep in touch.really do.

HOPE YOU HAD THE TIME OF YOUR LIFE!!!! I SURE DID!!